The 2:22 a.m. Text

At 2:22 this morning I got a text that read:

“If, as sartre says, ‘hell is other people’, then what is heaven? Solitude?”

Really? 2:22 am? Now, how do I sleep?

But this morning an answer came out of the top hat which I texted right away:

“how bout this interpretation: if hell is the feeling of being separate from everyone else ie people are ‘others’ then heaven is the feeling of oneness – that we are all connected, we are one…”

To get on that train of thought to see where it takes me – if I think of everyone else in the world as different or separate from Me, that Their actions are specifically against Mine and My well being, that They are selfish and egocentric and are only concerned with Themselves and getting Their way, then yes “Other people” would be hell.

By that token, if I think of Myself as being a part of the whole that is Humanity, then Heaven is not solitude but is once again “other people”; it is just my relationship to these “other people”; that our journeys are different but the same.

So to go back to the question, “Is Heaven solitude?” No. I think that Hell is solitude when we think of ourselves as separate from Other People even though we are in the middle of them. That we would choose to conflict rather than to collaborate.

But, I guess if you think that solitude is knowing and being comfortable with your authentic self, then “Is Heaven solitude?” the answer is Yes.

It always comes down to perspective, doesn’t it?

da hersh

A Future Story – Feedback

Greetings A Future Story readers,

This was the first edit of my first novel and I am grateful for everyone who has participated in reading it. It is a new adventure for me, a scary prospect and I am excited about how it’s been going. It is interesting for me to revisit parts of my life and seeing my raw thoughts laid out. And now onto the next part of this process.

The great thing about the blog medium is that there can be some interaction. I am interested in people’s reactions. I would love all feedback; what worked, what felt long, general impressions, memorable moments, personal reactions, and anything else you care to share. I am also open for questions and discussions about the themes, ideas, etc. Writing is so different from theatre in that I feel kind of bubblish and away from reactions so all you can share is greatly appreciated.

If you want our interaction to be private, you can message me on FaceBook:

https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=699886961

or if you want to post something publicly you can use this blog and/or the A Future Story FaceBook Page:

https://www.facebook.com/AFutureStory

If you ask a question I may post it and respond for others who are interested. For those who know me personally, I would also go for a tea and talk one day.

Thank you for your assistance in this endeavour. I would love to share discussion so please respond when you can.

Thanks again and I am looking forward to the ‘published in Book form,’ coming out soon.

David

A Future Story: Last Note…

Last Note…

If You are Me and You found a book called A Future Story, written by You but You haven’t written it yet, don’t panic, you’re not alone. There’s at least three others of Us in the same predicament. Enjoy the experience and publish it as your own, that’s what I did. And don’t worry if people believe your story. Those who believe, will and those who don’t, won’t. And those who do, will have their own magical conundrum one day and share it back again.

Hey You, have a good life and maybe We’ll All laugh about this over a chocolate milkshake in some other existence.

Cheers!
da hersh

A Future Story: Entry 27

Post-Epilogue, Epilogue

June 2nd, 2012

Hey.

It’s me, da hersh.

The Experiencer, the Writer, the Reader.

And now, the Editor.

I have sat with this Book for a couple of months. I lived it, I have read, and reread it. And I have resolved thus…

I believe that I am in fact Another Me – which totally blows my mind. I think I am closely connected to the original, Writer Me that begun this Book but I don’t think we’re going to be the same any longer. (As necessary, I will refer to myself as Editor Me.)

We are the same in the fact that:
- I found a book called, A Future Story in a used bookstore on January 19, 2012.
- I did not read it right away.
- In diary form, I wrote my thoughts and experiences down on my computer.
- When I did open the Book, it was exactly what I had written in my diary… almost.
- What is in the Book, is the Epilogue written by a Future Me.
- What is not in the Book, is this Post-Epilogue Epilogue and a few other things that I (Editor Me) added.

I am therefore not the same person as Writer Me but I am instead Another Me.

I believe that the Writer finds the Book and publishes it without the Epilogue as Future Me deduced.

When Future Me finds the Book, he publishes it including both the original text and his Epilogue. This is the Book that Writer Me found – which is also the Book that I (Editor Me) found.

If it is true that Writer Me and Future Me are caught in a time loop because Writer Me did not publish the Book with Future Me’s Epilogue, then I’m going to break the cycle and get this Book published with Future Me’s Epilogue and this Post-Epilogue Epilogue. By publishing it in its entirety, I am bringing the whole story together. With this action, I am also separating myself from the Writer Me. Everything changes now.

It reminds me of what Donatello, my Physicist friend said. Whether I decided to read the Book or not, I always have the freedom of choice. I create my own future. This freaks me out, but it also makes perfect sense and is therefore, simple.

I still don’t know how the Book travels through time and I may never know. But I’ve definitely changed my future by making a different choice than…

But wait.

Did I?

Have I changed my future? Or was this always what I was going to do; and that the Writer did what he was always going to do? We’re just two Davids living our two separate lives.

Possibly, probably, maybe.

It’s still a conundrum.

But I guess that’s the glory of the Universe. I am okay with not knowing. I got a magical experience that I wouldn’t trade for anything. There is magic in the world. There is magic and miracles and conundrums and paradoxes and it’s beautiful and exciting and I love that I get to share it. I couldn’t wait to publish my story which is why I am blogging it – that’s free and it’s the internet so anyone can read it.

Thank you, invisible supporters. I wish your lives to be filled with magic and total awesomeness.

I think this is the end of the Book.

A Future Story: Entry 26

[This is from the Book I found. This is what I’ve not written, only read and am now transposing for you.]

“Epilogue

Dear Gentle Reader.

My name is David Hersh. I am, and am not, the author of this book that you are reading.

I say, ‘I am, and am not…’ Let me tell my story so that I may clarify what I mean by my statement.

‘I am not the author.’

What I mean by this is, I did not write what you have read thus far. Where my participation begins is at the top of this page when you read, ‘Dear Gentle Reader,’ and nothing prior to this. (I do not count the little note at the front of the book to the possible Me of the past; but I will delve into that in paragraphs to come.) I will be author from this point onward and continue to expound and riff on the events leading up to “right now.”

‘I am the author.’

Not just in the way that I am writing now, but in a way that is much deeper and intertwined than simply saying, ‘I am the author.’

My Story.

First, let me say that I will, as in the style of the author up to this point, refer to myself as Present Me or PMe and then; the author of this book who in fact may be a Past Me, I will refer to as Long Ago Me or LaMe since Past Me would be PMe again which would complicate not clarify the following story and explanation.

Once again… My Story.

Recently, I spent the day strolling around the city. I enjoy experiencing strangers; people expressing their habits in their habitats, living their public lives, mostly unaware of their tics and behaviour-isms. I love to interact. I love to spy. I love to spy while interacting. Catching subconscious idiosyncrasies brings me such pleasure. I wish I had a basket I could carry with me where I could keep people’s idiosyncrasies and pull them out when I want a laugh or a cringe. Actually, I would love to carry more in this basket. Colours. Sounds. Smells. Faces. Moments of time. That I could just pull out when my spirit needed a boost. A Basket of Life Experiences, kind of like a Horn o’Plenty only you can only pull out what you put in.

I was meandering and as I wandered by storefronts, I was suddenly struck by an antique store’s window. I don’t know why I slowed down because I’d gone by the store many times before but I was struck by something in the window. It glittered. It was one of those old glam outfits from so long ago. It would have gone straight into my basket. Then I noticed, below the glamour, there was a series of books on display. There was one at the foot of the sparkled up mannequin and it struck me as very peculiar. I’m not going to beat around the bush to build suspense; the book was entitled “A Future Story” by “David Hersh” and there was my signature written under the typed up name.

Sound familiar?

Let me continue.

I am struck by this. I am perplexed. I am an author and I have many stories that have been produced, some a long time ago that would have made their first appearance in book form, but I have never published a story with that title. Did another author share my name? But, no, it was my signature on the cover so I continued to be perplexed, staring through that store window.

Of course, I had to buy the book.

You can’t let someone steal your identity. If someone else was an author with my name they should at least have added an initial. But once again, it struck me that it was my signature.

I bought the book, walked markedly to a cafe, Book clutched in hand, ordered myself a tea, and began to read.

I could not put it down.

What I read was what you’ve just read. It was this book minus this epilogue by me. PMe. I was fascinated. I was scared. I was enthralled and excited and flabberghasted. How could this be?

I had not written it but the voice in the… “Book”… was so familiar, so Me. It was as if I was reading something written for me by me but it wasn’t me because I didn’t write it. The details are not the same as PMy details but the similarities were identical in some situations.

Some information I could not discern because the author, potentially a past me, and I use “a past me’ and not “the past me’ in the same way the author talks about ‘a future’ and not ‘the future’, because the author purposely left details vague, i.e. people’s and city’s names in code. I think I know the cities but cannot know for sure if the names of them would be the same as LaMe – I don’t think Long Ago Me works. I shall refer to the author as Other Me, OMe. And please note, that I am not the Editor Me that OMe talks about. I think OMe edited his own work prior to what you’ve read in this published form.

Please understand that I did not write this Book. I found this Book in an antique shoppe; I have written this little epilogue explaining my involvement in this story, and then have gone on to cast it into the world, while sending the document to an old publishing house who makes limited printed editions for tactile enthusiasts – which I think is the best way to experience this story, a reminder of an older time. Anyway…

I found this Book and my conclusion is that this Book was written by an OMe from a past time. This OMe either a) created a fictional scenario whereby he speculated what it would be like if he found a book from his own future or b) he did find this Book and it was from his future and he then published it as his own in his time/space and everything in the Book is absolute truth – or mostly truth. Who can know for certain?

Although I give two possibilities, the one I believe to be true is b). I believe this OMe found this Book from a future. Maybe he finds this book that I’ve published. Maybe he finds the Book that was published in another timeline. Maybe this Book lives further into the future and is sent by an even more Future Me, or an Alternate Universe Me, or maybe a future family member. I don’t know how OMe got this Book but somehow, sometime, he will… he did.

Now a curiouser fact that I have not tackled is the fact that what PMe is writing right now, did not appear in the Book PMe found. I will be “I” or “me”, I find it difficult to write as my predecessor did. I will talk about myself as normally someone would and I will continue to refer as the Other Me as OMe. To rewrite the beginning of this paragraph…

Now a curiouser fact that I have not tackled is the fact that what I am writing right now, did not appear in the Book I found. Only what this OMe had written was in the Book so if in fact he does end up finding this precise book in that bookstore so long ago, this should also appear in his Book. If this is the case, then what we must conclude is that this Book you are reading and the Book I found are actually two different books.

Hypothesis Explained: OMe finds a Book from a future. It is this Book. This Book has my writing in it. OMe reads the Book and sees this epilogue from me and realizes that the Book he’s reading is from the future. He also realizes from reading my epilogue that my epilogue was not in the Book I read and I have only added it after the fact. Therefore OMe, must have realized that when I read the Book my epilogue is not present so OMe must therefore publish the Book himself without my epilogue. And if he hadn’t figured that out yet, by the time he reads this, he’ll know what to do. Therefore: two different Books; one with my epilogue which OMe finds and one without my epilogue which I found.

It still does not explain how the Book time travels but it does explain certain aspects of the story.

Another point of question is: Is OMe the same me as Me or is OMe an Alternate Universe Me?

Because I did not write this Book to begin with, at least I do not remember writing it, I hypothesize that this Book comes from an alternate dimensional timeline. In this other timeline, OMe has lived another life, with some similarities, but not exactly the same, which is why I don’t remember living it.

But there are many similarities in our actual lives; as well as in our philosophy of the world, speech and thought patterns. I find it fascinating, thoroughly fascinating and exciting; exciting to what the future holds.

Before I sign off, Gentle Reader, I would like to do an exercise that my counter part engaged in. I want to have a conversation with OMe and see how it turns out. I will do this under the same conditions; i.e. I will not edit myself but let it be as is.

A Conversation in which I talk with the Other Me

OTHER-ME:    Thank you so much for giving me this opportunity to talk to you.

ME:    Not at all. I didn’t realize that you would be so enthusiastic, or speak so quickly.

OTHER-ME:    I didn’t realize that I’d get this chance. I have so many questions for you.

ME:    You have questions for me? How does that work?

OTHER-ME:    What do you mean?

ME:    Well, I have questions for you. Pardon me, but I thought this would be a one way conversation because I’m here and real and you’re just an imaginary figure and didn’t think you’d have much to say unless I engaged you.

OTHER-ME:    But you’ve opened yourself up to me and you’ve read so much about me and how I think that you’re able to channel me quite easily.

ME:    So who is going to ask who what first? Did I just say that?

OTHER-ME:    It sounds a lot like me.

ME:    It does.

OTHER-ME:    Don’t worry I’ve done this with frequency so I understand. You’ll get used to what your voice is and what’s mine. So, why don’t we take turns asking questions. Why don’t I go first, that way you can ground yourself in your own voice.

ME:    Okay. Thank you. Go ahead and ask a question.

OTHER-ME:    What year are you in?

ME:    Hmmmm. I don’t know if we should get into specific questions like that. I don’t know if you will end up reading this, so I think I should remain vague in reference to specific time and my actual life choices, then you won’t feel influenced by my answers.

OTHER-ME:    Okay. I get what you mean. Nothing that would make me expect specific events at specific times.

ME:    I think that’s best.

OTHER-ME:    I agree. Okay. …How are you?

ME:    I am… I see… How am I, really.

OTHER-ME:    Yes. Not the in-passing, “How are you?’; the real truthful, you’re talking to someone who knows, “How are you?”

ME:     I am happy. And not the in-passing, “I’m happy.” I am truly, deep down in the pit of my heart and soul, Happy. I experience the world with open eyes and a receiving heart. When a problem arises with a person, I see the pained individual within, I see the pain remembrance within myself, I realize that we are one and the same and then I let it go and return to my happiness and know that my shift from pain to happiness will be somehow internalized by them and therefore change their life and give them a spark to change their own pain to love. When I am inside a difficult scenario, I do the same. I feel the emotional charge I get, I give thanks for the reminder and then I let it go because I am much happier when I let go and live in love. It is a brilliant place to be.

OTHER-ME:    That’s what I want. That’s what I’m working toward. Thank you for showing me that I might get there.

ME:    I thought that would be something you’d like to know.

OTHER-ME:    I did. I am grateful that you shared that with me. Now you can ask me a question.

ME:    This exercise is interesting for me. When I thought about doing this I had no idea what would come from it.

OTHER-ME:    No. I never knew either. You just have to be present and write and channel whoever you’re connecting with and let things happen. Do you have a question?

ME:    I must. But I’m so… I don’t remember you, you know.

OTHER-ME:    I know.

ME:    I remember nothing of your experiences and yet you’re supposed to be me.

OTHER-ME:    I know, but I think that I’m just another you. You said it yourself. We both are hypothesizing the same thing; we are the same person but from two separate timelines.

ME:    Right. What is your biggest challenge?

OTHER-ME:    Whoa! Really? What is my biggest challenge? In life? Why is that question bringing tears to my eyes? Why do you want to know?

ME:    I’m just curious if our challenges are the same. Are we the same soul just living different choices or is there a more significant separation and we are truly two separate entities? Sorry about the tears.

OTHER-ME:    Are we the same soul or are we separate? That’s a profound question. Who can we ask who might have the answer?

ME:    You mean, someone outside of ourselves?

OTHER-ME:    Yes, is there someone who can answer that?

ME:    Why don’t we just answer it? Does that scare you?

OTHER-ME:    Yes. You ask me what my biggest challenge of life is and then you ask whether we are truly the same soul or two separate beings and you don’t expect me to be a bit afraid?

ME:    Why are you afraid?

OTHER-ME:    I don’t know the answer, that’s why I’m afraid.

ME:    Are you afraid to ask?

OTHER-ME:    I just haven’t thought to ask. You’re the one that’s been living with the knowledge of the duality of Us but this is all new to me. I haven’t known that you existed until you started writing, until that point it was just me speaking to me and to the invisible audience I wasn’t even sure existed.

ME:    But now that you do know, now that we’re here, what do you think?

OTHER-ME:    Jeezabel. And yes, I meant Jeez-abel.

ME:    I know.

OTHER-ME:    Frack, you’re being all understanding and patient and shit. I’m avoiding. I know. Okay. Frack. Hold on. Let me begin by breaking this down. Do you mind if I invite a couple of friends to bounce these ideas off of.

ME:    You still want that outside confirmation from a higher being?

OTHER-ME:    Not really. I just have some friends that help bounce off ideas that are just parts of me. Indulge me.

ME:    Go ahead and invite your friends.

SHERLOCK:    Pip pip, everyone.

DOWNEY JR:        Holy mind-fuck. Now what have you got us into?

ME:    Oh my. This is a surprise.

DOWNEY JR:        How is it possible that you’re able to bring us into this conversation when we’re a figment of the imagination of a figment of your imagination? This is some fucking deep shit.

ME:     I don’t know. But I’m just going to step outside and let the Other Me do what he needs to do to answer the question.

OTHER-ME:    Thank you. Okay boys. The question is, are Me and FMe two totally separate, free thinking, individual beings? Or are we the same being living in multiple universes at the same time?

DOWNEY JR:        Ooooo, the multidimensional question.

ME:    Pardon?

DOWNEY JR:        You’re asking the multidimensional question.

ME:    Are you making that up? Is that a real “thing”?

OTHER-ME:    He’s always saying stuff.

DOWNEY JR:        Gotcha!

ME:    Does he ever contribute anything meaningful?

DOWNEY JR:        All my contributions are meaningful. You just don’t understand my meaning.

OTHER-ME:    You have to get used to him.

DOWNEY JR:        Sha-bang!

ME:    He’s distracting.

DOWNEY JR:        Exacting.

OTHER-ME:    Here play with this. (OTHER-ME hands ROBERT DOWNEY JR a miniature model of the Universe.) That should distract him for a while.

DOWNEY JR:        Ooooo, super-cool.

SHERLOCK:    One being or two. What is your evidence so far?

OTHER-ME:    We are two separate people – heck I don’t even know if we look alike.

ME:    Your physical description of yourself earlier in the Book could describe me.

OTHER-ME:    Is that good enough?

ME:    What if I put a picture of myself when I was roughly your age in this part of the book. Then you can tell me whether you look like that. I’ll do it right here.

 

OTHER-ME:    Great and I’ll write on one of the blank pages whether it’s me.

ME:    Oh, that’s what that means.

OTHER-ME:    What do you mean?

ME:    You wrote on one of the pages just at the end of your part of the Book, “BTW, it’s me.”

OTHER-ME:    Whoa! But you hadn’t done that yet?

ME:    I just did it.

OTHER-ME:    And I responded before you did it?

ME:    It must have been that person you call Editor Me.

OTHER-ME:    So that’s a picture of you.

ME:    Yes. And it’s you too?

OTHER-ME:    Yes.

DOWNEY JR:        Awww, family reunion.

OTHER-ME:    Play with your universe.

SHERLOCK:    So you appear to be the same person physically.

OTHER-ME:    Yes.

SHERLOCK:    But you are living in separate timelines.

OTHER-ME:    Yes.

SHERLOCK:    Different histories?

ME:    Partly. We were just trying to figure out how much is the same and what is different.

SHERLOCK:    Are you going to go through every moment in your lives?

ME:    I didn’t think we would.

OTHER-ME:    What if we find out about major life events?

ME:    Will that work?

OTHER-ME:    What do you mean?

ME:    You are still just an imaginary person. I am not really talking to you right now.

SHERLOCK:    How do you know that?

DOWNEY JR:    If you are the same Being, then maybe you are communicating in a way that transcends space and time.

SHERLOCK:    Exactly.

OTHER-ME:    Cool.

ME:    If that is the case then I will just have to trust that the answers we give are truth.

OTHER-ME:    Birthday?

ME:    That was the same as I read, July 27th.

OTHER-ME:    1970?

ME:    Yes.

OTHER-ME:    Same year? Crazy.

ME:    Parents names.

OTHER-ME:    I’ve been trying to be vague about people’s names so they are not harassed if this is ever published.

ME:    It is published, at least in my Universe. Okay, no names.

DOWNEY JR:        Why don’t you talk in some deep David code that only the two of you would know?

SHERLOCK:    That’s a good idea.

OTHER-ME:    Where do I spit?

ME:    On Denmark.

OTHER-ME:    Right.

DOWNEY JR:        What the…?

ME:    What did the woman in white say when I saw her in the rearview mirror?

OTHER-ME:    “Don’t worry, everything will be all right.”

ME:    Yes.

OTHER-ME:    What was the name of the café in Chartres and what was on the poster?

ME:    As if. Melodia café with a poster of a panda. Wow, those are very specific events, sayings and experiences. I cannot believe that they are the same.

OTHER-ME:    Neither can I.

SHERLOCK:    I believe this proves you are part of the same Being.

DOWNEY JR:        Really? The same Being but two different lives?

ME:    I guess I always thought that I was just one line of consciousness in a larger Being called David Hersh. And this David Hersh has multiple consciousnesses who each live a separate set of choices in separate timelines but who are ultimately all connected and can be traced back to the source David Hersh – this one multi-conscious being. Somehow we connected and this Book has been the conduit between our timelines.

OTHER-ME:    Do you think that there are more of us?

ME:    Many, many more; each with his own timeline.

OTHER-ME:    And do you think that there are other Davids who have read either your Book or mine and are going through the same experiences as we are right now.

ME:    I think that is definitely a possibility.

SHERLOCK:    A probability, I’d say. If you already share obscure similarities, I would wager that other yous do as well.

OTHER-ME:    What do you think is the nature of Time?

ME:    Time is a structure in our three dimensional world that keeps track of our present. What we experience in the moment is our present, and what isn’t now is a product of time – of our relationship to time. If it is not now then it is the past or the future. Time is also broad. It is not a single line representing only one definitive possibility. Time is more like a wave with multiple timelines side by side making a huge, thick tapestry of possibilities.

OTHER-ME:    And then this Being, David Hersh, is conscious of each of these timelines.

ME:    Yes, and is collecting information through all of them in order to grow and learn. Think of the Consciousness of David Hersh as being a physical body and that each of us individual timeline Davids are like cells in this greater Body. Each of our consciousnesses are just a fraction of the whole consciousness of the Home Base David Hersh.

DOWNEY JR:        That’s fucked up. And hypothetical bullshit, no?

OTHER-ME:    No real bullshit.

ME:    But hypothetically theoretical, none the less.

OTHER-ME:    And still possible.

ME:    Yeah, why not? Each of my cells doesn’t know it is part of a larger whole that makes up my Physical Body but it still does.

OTHER-ME:    Why then couldn’t we be “cells” or parts of a larger whole that makes up a Conscious Body.

DOWNEY JR:        You guys working together now, are you?

OTHER-ME:    Thanks for your time again, boys.

DOWNEY JR:        No problemo. Call anytime. Ciao. (He tosses ME the Universe he’s been playing with and exits.)

SHERLOCK:    A pleasure to be a part of these fascinating discussions. Venture on. Until next time. (He exits. We are left alone.)

ME:    You did that all the time? Talk to these characters in your mind?

OTHER-ME:    Yes. Don’t you have characters that you talk to?

ME:    Yes. I guess I do.

OTHER-ME:    I have a question for you. Something significant.

ME:    Okay…

OTHER-ME:    You’ve seen the date of my first entry. Do you remember that date? Did you go into a bookstore that day? Do you remember anything about that day?

ME:    It’s funny. I did look back in my collection of diaries to see what was going on in my life on that day and I did have an actual entry. On the day you found the book something significant did happen.

OTHER-ME:    Really? Tell me.

ME:    I was supposed to meet a friend at a coffee shop for a chitchat and usually when I did this, I often went early to look through the nearby used bookstore for a surprise book that would maybe jump out at me. But on this day, my friend called me and asked to change locations and meet for lunch instead, so I didn’t end up going to that cafe and therefore I didn’t end up going into that used bookstore.

OTHER-ME:    And this made it into your diary?

ME:    Oh, no. It was the reason why my friend changed locations; she just found out she was pregnant, and so wanted to talk over lunch rather than a quick tea. I had written in my diary about the surprises life gives us and how this friend who wasn’t planning on children was suddenly pregnant.

OTHER-ME:    Interesting.

ME:    Yes.

OTHER-ME:    Do you think that if you went to that used bookstore, you may have found the Book?

ME:    I don’t know. Was the Book meant for my timeline? Or only yours?

OTHER-ME:    I don’t know. (pause) Well, both of ours just at different times in our lives.

ME:    I guess so.

OTHER-ME:    How do you think the Book travels time?

ME:    I don’t know, but somehow it is traveling between the two of us.

OTHER-ME:    Back and forth. In a loop. So, where does it begin? If I find the Book that you’ve written and you’ve found a book that I’ve written and they’re the same book; who wrote it first?

ME:    I found the Book with only your writing and I am assuming, that you found the Book with both your writing and my writing. This would make me feel that you wrote it first.

OTHER-ME:    Yeah, but the only reason I ended up writing it is because I found it, which means it had already been written before I wrote it.

ME:    Well, I didn’t write it. Maybe there’s Another one of Us in another timeline who wrote a fictional telling of a Book from the future and it is this Book that is traveling across timelines.

OTHER-ME:    Yes, but wrote a Book that is word for word the writing I was doing prior to opening the Book? Which also means, that the fictional book turns out to be factual.

ME:    Much of our lives seem to have been synchronized so it could easily be that your life and this Another Life were also synchronized for the writing of the Book.

OTHER-ME:    Is this your theory?

ME:    I guess it is. If we are truly one being living multiple lives, then that theory could work.

OTHER-ME:    And the power of this Book to travel across timelines?

ME:    I have a principle I live by, “When the bug catches it, the bug catches it.” In other words, “If it is, then it is,” regardless of how impossible it seems to be. I believe in infinite possibilities. This is an unprecedented occurrence but just because it hasn’t been recorded by anyone before does not mean it couldn’t happen.

OTHER-ME:    “When the bug catches it…?”

ME:    Very wise words from my six year old niece.

OTHER-ME:    Does this non-answer satisfy you?

ME:    Yes, because I don’t see it as a non-answer, just a “for now until it is clearer,” answer.

OTHER-ME:    I guess I can be okay with that too. If you do find out something, send it in another book to me, wouldya?

ME:    You got it.

OTHER-ME:    Thank you. (pause) I think I am done.

ME:    I think I am done, too.

OTHER-ME:    Are you satisfied?

ME:    Yes. Are you?

OTHER-ME:    Yes.

ME:    Good. Because then I have done what I wanted to do.

OTHER-ME:    Take care of yourself. I’m going to drift back to my time and space. Maybe We’ll connect again somewhere, sometime.

ME:    That’s going to be some reunion.

OTHER-ME:    It certainly is.

ME:    Is?

OTHER-ME:    See you. Enjoy this life. Love you.

ME:    Love you, too. (OTHER-ME exits.)

End Scene.

[Back in the Now]

It’s funny, I seem to have answered the questions I posed prior to this conversation.

I did not plan on any of this when I began writing this “Epilogue.” I do not want to say anymore about it. I feel I could go on and on but this is not my story… I play a part but it’s not mine. I shall leave it with you, Gentle Reader. You come up with your own answers for the Hows and Whys. I’ve offered my thoughts and leave it at that.

Thank you, for sharing this experience and if you have any comments or impressions you would like to share, then please do in anyway you feel you can. Someplace where others might be able to respond and discuss.

Take care. Enjoy Life. And remember… “When the bug catches it, the bug catches it.”

David Hersh (The Present)

A Future Story: Entry 25

2012/03/08

 

Read the Whole Book and Immediately After Reading that Warning

Holy Muckle-muck!

What’s that supposed to mean?

Why would I post such a strong warning?

When did I post such a strong warning?

What time period did that warning come from?

I must have known how I would react.

Why would I do this to myself?

Blueberries.

I’m writing this in a different file. Maybe that’s it. Maybe I insert the warning after I read up to that point. Maybe I have already done all this before.

Wait! I have to pee.

I’m back.

I’ve got to go. Spent the whole day reading the Book. Hopefully I have some time to write in the cafe before I meet Maybeline. I’m later than I thought I’d be so we’ll see how it goes.

Later… In the Cafe

Got a full half hour before Maybeline is here.

Okay so I spent all day reading the Book. I didn’t end up reading last night because I was too tired and I didn’t want to inhibit my experience so I waited ‘til this morning and then I just read all day.

I’ve had a moment to step away from that urgent message that I just experienced. But let me go to it now. I want to know how and when that could be.

That warning only makes sense if it’s written after I’ve read this once. If I already know what’s coming up next. So it means that I am reading this for the first time in some other time. Sometime after now. But that means I am aware that I’m going to read the message. Is it that Editor Me that I thought may exist?

If I can make this clear. I read the Book. As I’m writing right now, I know that I haven’t published it yet. This is all present, pre-published writing. On my computer at home and around the various cities I’ve inhabited. If I eventually get this published then I have a chance to edit it and in that case if the Book is being sent back in time then I can warn myself not to go further when I do end up reading the Book which was today. So the warning is from a Future Me.

Okay.

It is from the same person who wrote the opening message to me in the front of the Book.

Okay. I’m okay. I just got lost in the story. I recognized the story until that warning. I got lost in my story that I forgot that this may not be my story but a Future Me’s story.

I’m okay.

So I shall do what I suggested and reflect while everything is still fresh.

Later. Night. My Final Reflection

All I could do today is read. I could not put the Book down. It was weird reliving all those moments. Especially the most recent ones. They are so close that they feel very present and real compared to the older writing which kind of feels very distant, as if it were a piece of fiction and someone else wrote it. Almost as if someone had told me what happened but I didn’t quite live it myself. It is detached, slightly. Did time do that? Did I really live those moments or do I only think I did because I kind of remember them, shadow-like?

But then there were some moments that were totally real and I remember them so clearly. And some of the messages that I forget, I forgot. What the crocodragondile said and the conversation with the Book and that weird image It described about following the Air. And the weird dream and yet the Book did go missing and the dream said that the Book would go missing so I have feelings of premonitions and, and, and…

I sometimes wonder that if someone was able to go into the past and change it, would they actually remember the original experience or would they only have the memory of the new experience, the former experience never really happening. It is possible that a Future Me could go back in time, change history, and the present me would never know because all I remember is what actually happened not the two events of what happened originally and then the changed experience. My past could be changing all the time and I would never know.

So many thoughts and experiences breezing through my mind and body.

While I was reading I had no idea where it would end. At the beginning I thought that perhaps this writing was all that was here in the Book. But as I recognized the end of my writing and saw that there were more pages than there should have been, I realized that there’d be more. Writing I have no idea about. This excited me. The thing is, I can see the Book is not done. I can see there is writing beyond this. The part of the Book I’m supposed to wait and see.

Am I done reflecting?

The Book is what I expected, at least thus far. There was no surprise in that. If the Book has an audience at one point, it won’t come as a surprise that what I’m writing and what you’re reading are the same. The thing that’s interesting, especially for me, is what comes next. What is the end of this Book? I know everything up to the warning. What’s next? Who is the author? What do they have to say? Is it going to be Me or someone else?

Reflect. Be calm and reflect. What else jumps out at me from what I read today?

I found this whole process enlightening. I learned a lot about myself, listening to my thoughts as I wrote them. I wrote without censoring, and so there is a lot of real present emotion and thoughts that have come out. My subconscious challenged me to be aware and not rely on easy avoidance answers but to dig deep, to face some of my fears and judgements. If nothing else this Book has given me an opportunity to grow in a very short time. I feel lucky to have been given this opportunity to participate in something beyond myself. Time. Space. It is glorious.

I am hoping that in this next section, I’m going to find out the answer to this mystery. The answer to how this Book can exist. Where is it from? When is it from? How was it written? How can a Book I haven’t yet written be the inspiration to write the Book? There’s something missing that I don’t understand yet and I am hoping for an answer.

But let me reflect on what I’ve read before I go on.

Standout thoughts. I guess the fact that everything in here is true is astounding. When I read some parts I thought, ‘That’s unbelievable,’ but I know it is all true and I hope when the Book is published sometime in the future, that everyone who reads it will realize there’s more going on in the World than we think and that there is all this beauty and magic and real fantasy that we can each experience every day.

List of Standout Thoughts

I never really found the Air to follow.
Crocodile was an amazing revelation.
I travel a lot. I am sort of a gypsy and I kind of like it.
I am loved and watched over.
Robert Downey Jr. is a person I admire.
Sherlock Holmes is a character I admire.
Dreams have meaning and it is easy to figure it out if you just take the time and allow your intuitions to be right.
I can make decisions without having to defend them.
I am a brave and strong person.

I don’t know if all this shows up in the Book but I guess I’ll find out soon. I’m going to sleep now and allow my subconscious to process and integrate everything I have read. It was theory prior to reading the Book. Now it is fact.

I wrote a Book that I hadn’t written yet, and without reading it, the two were exactly the same. But this next part; I have not written the next part. Not as far as I know. I have no intention of writing anymore so anything written from here on in is beyond my expectation. I do not plan to fill this Book with anything else so I suspect what comes next is not me. At least it won’t be the present me.

But my eyes are in pain. A lot of reading. A lot of writing. I can wait until tomorrow to read the unknown. I would love to have a clear mind and to do a little meditation before. This unknown territory is what I am most frightened about. I read everything I knew and expected in one chunk only to get to this part. I can’t wait until morning.

Thank you, Editor Me, for catching Me before I went on. I needed to rest at this present plateau so that I am clear and available for the final bit. I’m excited. Maybeline and Candice are excited. I can’t wait to let people know what’s there.

Breathing joyous breaths. Time to sleep. Time to dream.

This is the end of Me.

Thank you for accompanying me on this journey. You have been an invisible support of highest measure and I am honoured to share this with you.

Goodnight.

A Future Story: Entry 24

[The Page After the Blank Pages]

David!

Don’t read any further, yet!

Don’t!

Write a response now, before you go on. Everything changes after the last page you wrote.

The blank pages are the warning I’m giving to Myself so that I know, You know, that We should just take a moment to reflect before We continue. I am writing this to Myself after I have finished reading it all and I realize that I must stop here. Take the time. Reflect.

Don’t worry, it’s not bad what comes next. I just think We need time to process before You go on. Then you can read the section after your reflection.  That’s when it will be over.

You are a brave man. I am proud of Us.

Reflect.

Love,
da hersh (Editor Me)

A Future Story: Entry 23

*[There are three sets of blank pages and at the bottom of the final blank page it reads…]

“BTW, it’s me.”

A Future Story: Entry 22

2012/03/08

Just Past Midnight

It’s like a golden light has filled my body. I feel warm and teary eyed. I am just looking at the subtitle page and it is glorious. It says everything I am feeling and goes beyond. I know I have written this. I know that this is some message from Me beyond what I thought I’d get.

This is Awesome.

I’m going to turn the page. I probably won’t write anymore until I am through. Oh glorious day! O jubilations! Sweet frenetic fireworks! Next page and not again until I am done.

Hold on.

There’s a message to me under the message to Ezmeralda. I will quote it exactly as it is written.

To David,
For having the strength to leap into the unknown.
Continue to leap, and hop, and swim, and boogie, and flap and twist into all the Unknowns to come. Be brave and read on.
Love,
David

And other Gentle Readers… do the same!

I don’t know if I can go on but the Book is urging me to. Maybe urge is too strong. The Book is inviting me to. I have to pause after this message and just be in the world of that.

Okay, no more squidging over to my computer. I am going to turn it off and not turn it on again until I have finished reading. A complete reveal will happen then.

Good-bye for now. Love you.

A Future Story: Entry 21

2012/03/06

Back to the Real Timeline – The Day Before I Plan to Open the Book

Had to wake up God awful in the morning in order to drive to Erniewhere in order to finish off a contract I had there. Double ‘in order to.’ So my mood hasn’t changed much. Still feel a bit corrugated today. It’s been a long one.

Drove in this morning. Worked. Napped. Organized. Had a meeting with my March Break camp councillor. Saw a whole bunch of depressing and heavy plays at Candice’s school, went to dinner with Candice…

Time with Candice was great. I love spending time with her. I missed her when I was in NYC. She can’t wait to find out what’s in the Book. She wants me to call her as soon as I look at it.

…went to dinner with Candice, talked to Maybeline on the phone, played backgammon with Candice and am now ready for bed.

Maybe I spent a full day so I don’t have to think about tomorrow. Distraction so I don’t get too excited. Yesterday was just such a full day mentally and emotionally, today was a full day physically. I guess tomorrow should be a full day spiritually and in that way everything will balance off.

I found out tonight, that there is some major solar flaring going on up there in the Universe and there is a huge barrage on our Magnetosphere right now by the Sun. I quote, “It’s a clear harbinger that the Sun is waking up.” It is all part of the Sun’s eleven year cycle of solar activity. That’s quite cool with what’s going on with me. Initiation? Birth? Once again just a sign that everything is more connected than you realize.

Reading this makes me feel that my erroneous behaviour is connected to these major sun flares. I’ve got a headache – I rarely get headaches, and my emotions are whoop-dee-fakazzle. I totally believe that the environment effects our being and that these rare solar flares have something to do with my reactions to what’s going on in my life.

I’m just glad today is over. I go to Burtown tomorrow and I open the Book and then I’m done.

Then I’m on my way.

Then something will happen.

Or won’t.

Forget it. Too tired. Feeling overly emotional. Maybe today wasn’t totally just a physical drain but continues to be emotionally charged as well.

I should be excited but I just feel like a whiney kvetch. Sleep it off.

Blech!

2012/03/07

It is Wednesday, March 7th. And here am I.

The drive in today was maniacal. It seared with anticipation. My mind could not focus. I wanted to drive all over the place – I don’t know what that means. I mean that if I relied on my sense of focus, I would have been driving on all sides of the road, upside down and shmucked every road sign during the five hour trip.

It is late. 11:27 pm. I have been sitting with the Book. I haven’t opened it yet. Candice texted me, wondering if I’d done it yet. Maybeline asked when she got home. She’s in bed now. But I haven’t. Not yet. But I want to. I want to do it today. I don’t know why, I just do. It is a date I set for myself and so I want to keep the date.

11:30.

I’m afraid now. But really afraid. I’m sad. I’m anxious. I’m nervous. My stomach is angry with the world. My eyes are burning. These frackin’ solar flares. I blame them for my overall ill manner. The time is closing in.

I didn’t give myself enough time to write. I didn’t give myself enough time to contemplate the magnitude of this moment.

11:33.

33. There’s that number again. I missed it. I should have opened the Book at 11:33. Or 11:11. That would have been perfect. That’s a magical number. But I should have planned that hours ago.

What took me so long to get down to write? Why did I not give myself ample time to make this a momentous occasion? Why did I talk about my drive in? Why am I complaining about it now?

Midnight. I am going to aim for midnight. Or 11:59, that way I’ll open it today but I’ll be reading it into tomorrow. March 8th would be okay too. 03/08. 8 sideways is infinity. I wrote a play that takes place in 1888 and wrote a monologue about the 8’s. 1888; three eights – 03/08. Significant? Seems like a stretch. But, still aim for midnight.

11:41.

Okay, this is my 18 minutes of writing before I open the Book. No matter where I am at 11:59; I will stop and open the Book. So what do I want to say?

When I stop complaining and creating drama around this; when I just close my eyes and breathe; I am cellularly excited. My very soul is rich with comfort and angelic anticipation. I am wonderously lucky to be in this situation. How many people get to experience another reality?

Reality. Thought of that in the car today. Our sense of reality is based on what we perceive to be real. Scientific laws govern a lot of how we interpret and see the world. I believe that the laws of reality are much more fluid than we think. They are not so rigid that there isn’t space in them for unknown. I think the unknown is very much a part of the rules. And I believe that the more we include the possibilities of magic, signs and omens; the more that they will exist in our lives. These past two months have been awe-filling. I am completely amazed with the unusual things that have come my way. And I love them. And the more that I accept them as part of the scientific laws of Being then the more they take on importance and frequency in my life.

11:52.

Closing in. I’m feeling good now. I am ready for this. I know there may be some hard days after all this but I want to do it. I want to open the Book and see what’s inside.

I’m excited.

I’m thrilled, actually.

Actually, this maybe the most significant moment of my life. My dreams coming true. My beliefs in what this Universe really Is are going to be revealed and proven to me. I know it. The mere existence of this conundrum was already proof. Now I will delve deeper into it.

I am prepared for my mind to be blown.

I am prepared to be colossally disappointed.

11:57.

The Book is in front of me. Hello Book. Ready to go?

Thank you Universe for bringing this into my life. I love it all. I love all the people who got involved, even those who did not know they were contributing to this mind blowing occasion.

11:58.

Thank you everyone and everything.

Quiet. Breathe. Blueberries.

11:59.

I’m going to open the Book now. Nothing more to say. Just doing it. Chills that fill my body like champagne bubbles.

Wish me luck.